Crazy

All I can do is tell you the truth…and you and Patsy Cline will have to decide if I should take up space in the nearest psychiatric facility.

I had another one of those whack-a-doodle mornings.

This morning, while reading one of the sections in a chapter entitled “The Holy Instant” in A Course In Miracles, I came across the sentence, “You (meaning moi) don’t know what love is.”

Well, hello! No kidding! I wrote a whole friggin’ blog about it almost two weeks ago (www.theyearoftheboy.blogspot.com “I Wanna Know What Love Is”). Since then I have pretty much been patiently floating in the ocean of devotion to my new North Star intention waiting for the winds to gently propel me in the appropriate direction.

Seriously! It would really be helpful (and save me precious floating around waiting time) if the universe could keep better track of my blogs.

Anywhooo…the words literally leapt off the page. Aside from being just a tad bit annoying (why rub my face in it?), my non-egoic response was something along the lines of “ Since I have already asked the question, and I am getting confirmation that I have no idea what Love is, I guess I am on the right course.” I decided to meditate on it (for the billionth time in the past two weeks).

As I have mentioned before, I often meditate aloud. I talk to the universe, God, the Greater Field of Life. It’s just what I do. This morning, I let anyone who happened to be listening know that I am ready to shed what no longer serves me or others, I am ready to radiate out to others and look for the radiance in them, all of them in the Global Family (that would be you).

In other words, I announced, “I really, really wanna know what Love is.”

A soon as the words exited my mouth, I felt His presence at the foot of my chaise. Today, I didn’t open my eyes not because I was afraid of Him, but because I sensed that something miraculous was about to happen, and I wanted to take it in sans mes yeux.

As it happened when He made his debut in June, I first felt an intense light making its way through my eyelids followed by its anchoring in my body. His radiance penetrated my skin from the inside out, creating an all-encompassing swaddling of my body in light and warmth. He cleared away any darkness that I held within. My radiance responded and exited my epidermis from every pore. I was saturated in this co-created radiant space and energy that was so magnificent and simple and freeing that it immediately brought me to tears.

J.C. and I had a brief conversation in that cool kind of mind-meld Dr. Spock way that we had used before. His message was “Feel this. This is Love.”

Yes, at the same time all of this was happening, I did have the sense that I was perched (in the teeniest tiniest way) on the brink of “Do I need to be committed somewhere?” But I have to tell you, it felt so stinkin’ good that I didn’t really care.

If this is what crazy in universal Love feels like…bring it on.